Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Do You Know This Guy?


I call him the Random Arab Dude, in case you don’t know him let me give you a few facts about him:

a. There’s really nothing, and I mean nothing special about him, he’s just a guy and he exists.

b. He hasn’t been to the barbershop for a while now.

c. He’s not happy, nor is he sad, he’s just, well, he’s fine.

d. He doesn’t wear colorful clothes and prefers beige.

e. He’s not tall, not that short either, but he’s below average.

f. His clothes are one size larger than they should be.

g. He hasn’t bought a new pair of shoes since forever.

h. In general you can say he’s not that financially stable or at least he doesn’t seem like he is rich or wealthy.

i. He’s kinda ok with all that and you can consider him “at peace”.

So where do you find this guy? (I know you’re not really interested in finding him but I’m just saying), here’s where to look:

1. Go to the ATM with a friend or so, let them get some cash and stand a couple of meters away. That dude trying to figure out how much money your friend has in his/her account is a RAD. Is he squinting? There you go. Now he’s not some thief who wants to get the PIN in order to steal the card later, he just wants to know how much money people have, how much they need, how much they took and maybe if they want a receipt with that transaction.

2. If you’re standing in a queue, let’s say you want to pay bills and you have the invoice with you. Can you feel someone breathing down your neck? When you look over your shoulder do you see someone’s head? Another RAD. He’s harmless; he just wants to know how much you’re paying for electricity or whatever.

3. You find a parking spot that is exactly the size of your car so you’re trying to squeeze it in, and while you’re not that good at parallel parking you can do just fine when you don’t feel like someone is watching you, except RAD is right there watering the plants and paying attention to your every move, until you step out of the car.

4. You’re walking in the street and get your skirt (sorry guys) caught in some bushes so you trip and almost fall flat on your face, you pull your skirt, pick up what’s left of your dignity and pray that no one saw that flower you doodled on your leg when you were bored and forgot to wash, think again, RAD is right there, he even feels sorry for you.

5. Your friend bought something faulty and wants to get a refund and they’re having an argument with the salesman at the store while you’re standing there, the RAD is the audience, he will probably go home and tell his wife about this fight he saw today at that store and what was wrong with your friend’s item.

6. Now you have to watch Jordan TV’s 8 o’clock news cast to get this, the correspondent is reporting from a street in some Jordanian city about how, let’s say everyone is really happy that it snowed (classic JTV news cast where they show you clips of kids playing with snow from the 1991 season) who’s there to demonstrate those feelings of joy? Around 10 RADs standing behind and next to the reporter either waving at the camera (maybe with a victory sign or two), smiling goofily or being all cool and laid back staring at the camera with absolutely no expression on their faces whatsoever.

Please don’t tell me you still don’t recognize the guy! He’s particularly everywhere! (Either that or I'm going insane.)

Disclaimer: I'm not really talking about this particular guy in the picture! He just happens to look similar.