Monday, March 8, 2010

Happy Driving to All of You!

What’s with girls crossing the streets? Is there like a speed limit (of one step per five minutes) for female pedestrians?

Every time I’m driving, and especially when I’m in a hurry, there has to be a very very very slow girl (or most of the time two girls) crossing the street like she’s walking on eggshells.

The other day on my way to work, I had to take a right turn and when I did there was one of those (as I call them) “the whole world is against me” type of woman, and I wish I could say she was crossing the street but she wasn’t, because she was walking in a parallel line with cars! I’m telling ya the woman had her own lane in the middle of the street, and when you’re driving on the main road and all the cars behind you are waiting for you to take the damn turn the last thing you need is someone walking slowly right at the spot you’re turning from. So I honked the horn very gently and in a very subtle way and what do I get? You’ve guessed it: the death stare. So I was like “ya sabbaa7 ya 3aleem”, la2 w ya rait et7arrakat! It was something like this:

Anyway this is not just about girls, guys also have their things when crossing the street, you know when you’re driving, and you see that this guy just saw you so he didn’t cross, but when you’re just next to him he starts to? It’s like he’s throwing himself at your car! I have no clue why they do that but it freaks the hell out of me!

And speaking of those, watch out from those people who intentionally throw themselves at the car as a way to get money from you, there’s more of them these days. A couple of months ago I was also driving in Wadi Saqra Street (from the Hada’eq side) and it was almost empty aside from a few cars when suddenly these two boys jump out from between the bushes to cross the frickin' street and one of the them was wearing roller blades so he almost fell in front of the car!!! I have to say I spent the night searching for my heart which fell between the pedals and finally picked it up and put it back inside of me.

A couple of things before I go:

1. Happy women’s day to all the ladies out there, please walk faster.

2. Before you starting reading too much into it, the woman in the picture is wearing a Hijab only because the one in the story did, and I’m NOT saying Muslim women stare at you when you honk your horn. And they definitely won’t kill you if you do either.

3. Volkswagen are NOT paying me to use their car interior in the picture where my heart is next to the gas pedal, my obsessive compulsiveness is the reason for it, because I do drive a Volkswagen and I want everything to be like it is in real life. (for the record, it is the BEST car I’ve ever driven and I love it and you should go buy one).

4. My heart is ok now al hamdolellah.


Whisper said...

I exactly know what you are talking about :S

What I hate the most,when they are walking normally, and when you drive by them they start walking slower and slower and start chatting with each other :$

M said...


Everyone has been complaining about it lately. B7amlo eli bamr2hom alf jmeeleh!

Anonymous said...

remember the boy with the roller-skates IN THE DARK hada ma fee ba3do =)

Ali Alhasani said...

There is a video on youtube from AMMAN COMEDY FESTIVAL and one of the comedians talks about people crossing the street in jordan and he mentions stuff like you mentioned in a very funny way.

I go through this CRAP every single day and let me be more accurate " Every single HOUR " since i spend almost the whole day on the roads and always ALMOST hit people because of there stupid way of crossing the street.

For me when i cross the street i always " RUN FOR MY LIFE " even though there aren't any cars because you never know what might happen, Everyone should do the same specially the LAME women who think they're showcasing CLOTHES on a runway, LOL!, God help us.

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